Kenya's new Judicial Garb : Dressed to till?

The much awaited unveiling of the new garb for judges was one of the most deplorably shabby and unedifying judicial spectacles we have had the misfortune of witnessing as Kenyans . As an urgent recourse to justice the Director of Public Prosecutions Keriako Tobiko should have immediately intitiated proceedings against the person responsible and a court other than the supremely embarassed one left to expedite the conviction of the culprit(s) for a criminal lack of fashion sense.

No money could have bought the pained expression of distaste on Njoki Ndungu's face, one of the two women in the supreme court, and the awkward pangs of embarassment on the rest. The judicial emperors and empresses were portrayed as foolhardy stiff necks and were stripped  of their dignity in the new outfits. Like in the fable of the Emperor's New Clothes they had to have been tricked to parade to Kenyans such undignified and atrocious 'things'.  Six of the judges seemed to have been ambushed or marooned with the uncomfortable imperative to dorn the ludicrous garb.

 Only the oblivious Chief Justice, Dr. Willy Mutunga soldiered on and pretended to be neither pertubed by the farcical outfits nor by the urge amongst those present to laugh them out.  On the merit of his demeanour many Kenyans were left with the perception that the chief justice was probably a cheeky suspect or bumbling culprit in the gaffe. Should the goal have been to inspire a humble ambience -- then those responsible outdid themselves. By going straight out for the lowest rung and grossly humiliating the august bench.

It leaves one to wonder what good it did to gleefully lump their Lordships with tea pluckers who are strenuously prevailed upon to put on similar looking polsysterene coats at tea plantations. Mercies! The 'supremes' probably even have comparable contraptions in their farm stores or in their kitchen cabinets for dishwashing!

We are an agricultural nation, only I didn't know the constitution envisions that we aspire to be a thoroughly rustic one as well. This with ridiculous looking judges trying to evince venerated dignity in front of bemused suspects and litigants; whilst at the same time having the lawyers' legal minds forcefully bent into more verdant dispositions by the agricultural ambiance whenever they enter the courtroom.  With this switch of gears we will be sufficiently rusticated in a few years. So much so our brothers across the borders would fear no more the political integration of East Africa. A fear that arises out of the apprehension they will be dominated by the overstated wily nature of Kenyans -- which is the only thing good I can envision coming out of this shambanization.


The design should have remained the same, with the same black patterns, belts and the rest with only the red replaced with a resplendent blue (ICC Trendifilova blue)  made of good quality material. 'Good' meaning not some shiny, cheap, flimsy thing fit for the red light district. The expensive wigs though should be left to their dead owners, if they really do come from the shaved heads of dead white men or more fittingly -- imposed on the Nairobi City Council ascaris (sic), the worm characters who nefariously prowl the streets of Nairobi with the pretext of enforcing by-laws. Saddled with expensive wigs on their heads perhaps they would think twice before chasing hawkers to their early deaths on the death traps that are the Kenyan roads.

M. Wycliff,
Nairobi.